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iguanamouth:

people who can fall asleep within five minute of lying down are not actually humans beings but thousands of bedbugs in a flesh suit who dont require sleep and are merely waiting for you to lower your guard

misterfontaine:

reasons to play dragon age: u can kick innocent men into molten craters and no one dares question u

litterbot:

unclefather:

enhance

confirmed

Source: bird-bum

lovealishadawn:

la-temeraire:

marigolds-sorry:

I really really needed this wow

i caNNOT STOP LAUGHING

LOOK AT THOSE POSITIVE ROLE MODELS

SAY NO TO PEER PRESSURE

Source: thumbsandammo.blogspot.co.uk

uncle-bilbos-haunted-hole:

captainswanismylife:

Once Upon a Time + Lost 

WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

Source: captainswanismylife

Open RP

uncle-bilbos-haunted-hole:

*Throws self off a cliff*

*Is hulk*

*Jumps into the air and catches you*

uncle-bilbos-haunted-hole:

i-am-the-lordofthebears so I started feeling better and then looked at the clock and its 1am and now I feel like shit again cuz why can’t I be a normal adult with a normal sleep schedule who does normal productive things? I think you need to become violent with me.

*Punches you in the nose*

*Steals your computer*

I HOPE YOU FIND PEACE IN THE UNIVERSE AND EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OKAY MAN

*Kicks you*

*Jumps out window into parked car*

*Drives into night while disco music plays*

phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess:

francsforthememories:

phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess:

On the downside, I’m not that attractive.

On the UPside, if I lived back in Aztec times, they wouldn’t sacrifice me to the Gods for my beauty, by tearing my beating heart out of my chest…

So there’s that…

According to science we are actually getting more attractive, so there’s a good chance they would consider you beautiful and thus sacrificeable. Sorry dude, no getting out of this one.

image

Source: phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess

singlepatriotsinyourarea:

this is the real first page of a real book by a real Fox News host

Are you sure this isn’t from the onion 

Source: singlepatriotsinyourarea

Source: sivildisobedience